The College World Reporter

40 Year Old Princess & the Frog

 

I was on my way to see a movie a couple of weeks ago and I ran into a gang of Princess’ leaving the new Disney production of “Princess and the Frog” movie. When I say, I ran into a gang of Princess’ it was just that. There were these beautiful little majesties that came straight out of a story book. They were magical and filled with the spirit of the movie. They waved their wands and were draped with pink and glitter form head to toe. I felt humbled in their presence. I felt humbled the way that only royalty can surrender you. I saw the distinct possibilities of them maturing into the hierarchy of nobility and then transcending into “GODDESS”. However, most times a dream deferred does dry up like a raisin in the sun. The reality is that their individual potential will likely be wasted on false idioms of chivalry and old out-dated feminine ideology that fall short of making a way for them in the “NOW”.

 

In my book, “The Man-You-All” I take a look at the affects of fairy tales on the subconscious of women and from there the way they mold ‘their ideas” about what a man is “suppose to do”. The fairy tale most would say is outdated and passé. Others say that “Someday my Prince will come”. But for the 40 year old princesses out there therapy is on the way. The impact of fairy tales are so in grained in the subconscious of the culture that the blatancy of their presence is not even necessary anymore. The culture has assimilated their very essence. The fairy tale is the first. It is a complete microcosm of the way both genders interact with one another compassionately, affectionately and romantically. It is for most boys and girls their first “LOVE”. The new Disney production sets a precedent by having the first African American Princess presented to a commercial audience. The “Mad Men” on Madison Avenue must be looking at the marriage statistics for African Americans and panicking severely, this movie had to be made.

From the non-believer to the truest convert our ideas about relationships are shaped early by a fairy tale construct, period. As a by-product of celluloid this is your indoctrination whether direct or indirectly. Rather if your mother warned you about a wolf like character out in the streets plotting to lead you off the path of chastity or if you were prepped since birth to marry only a certain kind of man, its remnants are there.

Now the question I have for my 30+ Princess’ is-“WHY”? The Relationship begins with “YOU” and not with the “TWO”.  The “YOU” designs the fabric of your life. The “YOU” takes the fairy tale and processes it and uses it to create something unique and special. Listen, personally I love fairy tales. I love the music, the animation, the story and the lessons. But the architect of my personal fairy tale is me and me alone. If you are a little girl that dresses up like a princess sometimes I understand. Even if you are that little girl that snaps off when your mother wants you to take off your princess costume, I understand. But if you are a grown woman who dresses up like a little princess for her birthday every year and uses new years as an excuse to put a Tiara like object on your head-help is on the way.

Tiana and the Prince have an opportunity to find R.E.A.L love when both are turned into frogs because they have to work to see the real person inside. They are a reflection of each other while working together to find a solution to their dilemma. That sets the pace for the Happy Ending along with creating a business together. I love it. The drama that ensues makes the movies that much more great. The lesson in the end is about inner beauty, which is the only beauty, and is the only message that needs to be taken away from the experience.

If you have a comment about my column, or if you have a relationship question, please post it here.

If you have a comment about my column, or if you have a relationship question for me, please post it here.